Holiday Depression: Forget Christmas Depression

Christmas depression can ruin one of the best periods of the year when we should be able to enjoy time with friends and relatives. But why do you feel so down during Christmas? What are the reasons for your holiday depression? I’m sure you know what they are. Would you like to know how a simple thing can improve your mood?

What I’m going to tell isn’t just related to Christmas depression, it can be used whenever you are feeling down in the dumps, whatever the reason. For a general discussion about low moods you can probably find interesting also my article on Sadness, Melancholy and Depression.

December is for me the best period of the year, lights everywhere, everyone seems to be happy and eager to have fun with everyone, decorations, Christmas trees, Santa Clauses, etc. The spirit of Christmas is everywhere and everyone seems to be merry. At least that is how it should be.

However for some people holidays and especially Christmas bring depression. There are many reasons to feel depressed in that period, maybe you are alone, or you have lost recently a loved one, or for other personal reasons at Christmas you feel down instead of happy. A friend of mine who has lost his wife is obviously not so happy as he sees families all around enjoying themselves and misses his wife a lot. Luckily though he has two sons who make him feel not alone.

Given this if you’re feeling such a holiday depression you have only two choices: either dig into your depression staying at home alone and feeling every day worse than the previous one or you can act and do something to counterbalance your low mood. I’d go for the second one. Action reduces depression, believe it or not, while staying still you just go more down in the dumps.

You can choose what you want to do to be occupied and avoid indulging to your Christmas depression, but my advice is to do something for someone else. Giving is one of the best thing you can do when feeling depressed and doing something to help people in need has the magical effect of lifting our mood almost instantly. Everyone feels great when has the chance to help someone else. Believe it or not helping people in need can really make miracles for your low mood especially at December when there are so many opportunities to give. Also giving or just talking with someone who needs your help can remind you that there are situations worse than yours, and that at the end your position is not so bad.

As we are talking mainly about Christmas depression my advice would be to go to your local church and give your willingness to help at some orphanages or giving away free food to those in the need. Or you can try to go and help at a children’s hospital. Children are the future of our world and there are so many of them which could benefit from your help at Christmas, and obviously the rest of the year too. Children in hospitals or orphanages will benefit immensely from your active participation in making their holidays better. And don’t forget that for children Christmas is the most important day of the year; wasn’t it the same for you?

If you have technical abilities you could even create some toys for them, or decorations, or cook some cakes, or just tell them a beautiful story. Whatever you like to do staying with children in need at December is one of the best ways to use your time, even if you don’t suffer from Christmas depression. Actually children can lift your mood almost always.

Is there a better day for a child than Christmas? So why not help them and receive back a little of their happiness? Believe me, this December help children or other people in need and holiday depression will fade away or at least be reduced to an acceptable level. Do it and this will be a great Christmas, for you and for those you help. Just look around for a suitable association to join, there are plenty out there. Or if you prefer also older people needs help especially on Christmas. Why not going to an old people’s home and help them having a nice Christmas this year? It’s just one day of your life but it could really make wonders for your mood.

Try and see if it’s not better than remaining on your coach. Listen to me, help people in need and you Christmas depression will fade away in a snap. Go to your local church or other associations and ask them if you can help, they’ll be glad to have it.

Could you be interested in a simple technique to learn how You can be Happy now?

Now I’d like to know your opinion: am I right? Am I wrong? What do you think? How do you usually handle Christmas depression? Or other kinds of holiday depression? Do you think helping people in need can help you feel better?

You might find useful this free Hypnosis video named Drifting Clouds, it will get you more relaxed and optimistic just in seven minutes.

I wish you this Christmas to be better than the previous ones, but not as good as the next ones.

Holiday Depression: Forget Christmas Depression

About Andrea Hypno

By Andrea Hypno. Hypnotherapist, Stress Manager, Life Coach, etc. Hypnosis and Personal Development are my bread and butter and I love helping people to have a better life. Don't forget to subscribe for updates and never lose a post, it might be the one you need.

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8 comments

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hypnodude

Hi Jo, thanks for coming and for taking the time to leave a comment. While you are right about the CRB check not every country of the world uses it, Italy doesn't and many other places too. While I talked about giving to children in places where there is the CRB check or similar things it's still possible to go and help adult people like homeless or families living in poverty. If you can't help children giving them a happier Christmas you can still help some adults. It's your choice, just help someone else.
I've had to check the meaning of flippant, well, it can be you are right and I'm addressing depression not enough seriously or pompously but the honest truth, and everyone who has suffered from depression can tell you that, is that the more you remain at home thinking how much your life s*ks the more you get depressed and the worse you feel. Thus going out and helping someone else distract your mind from yourself and your problems relieving your depression at least for a while.
The fastest way to come out of depression is to do something and keep occupied so that you can't focus on being depressed. Too simple? Maybe, but it happens that the answer is simple.
Thanks again for your comment.

Go to hospital and help sick children?...what about a 3 month wait for the CRB check?!! I have never read such a flippant article about depression in my life. Quite shocking.

hypnodude

Hi Marie, thank you very much for your kind comment. I agree with you, our thoughts do have influence on our feelings, either negative or positive.
Taking as an example your sister, well, there's nothing worse than loosing a son or a daughter but doing something which can bring a smile on a child face I guess can help your sister feeling better, and even if it works only for five minutes at least in that time she feels better. Five minutes are better than zero minutes.

While we can't change what happens to us most of the times we can change how we react or we can do something so that at least for a while we feel better.

Thanks also for the hint about the HearthMath Institute.

Thanks again, have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! :)

hypnodude

Hi Tricia, thanks for taking the time to leave a comment, much appreciated. Let me try to answer to your most important points:

"Suffering from serious depression – then it totally unlikely that you’ll be able to look after yourself, let alone be much use to anyone else."

You are right, first because suffering from serious depression makes it really hard to look after yourself, and secondly because if at the same time you're under medical drugs it's unlikely you're able to do anything. Some medical drugs are stronger than street drugs.
But, you're lying on your bed able to do nothing except breathing, what if a fire start? Or an earthquake hits your home? Do you remain on your bed or are suddenly able to move and jump out of it in a split second? That is to say that sometimes you're able to do nothing because you don't have a good enough reason. Other examples could be a loved one in danger, your daughter crying, etc.

"The implications are very unsavoury in the least, as if the person is knowingly wallowing in self pity – far from a real, educated understanding of depression."

The problem is if an educated understanding of depression is the right way to help someone suffering from depression. From what I know from depression one of its features is that it's almost completely self centered, you think only about yourself, your negative feelings etc., that is self pity. While digging in the dirt can be a not very educated term it explains pretty well the situation, the more you focus on what's negative in your life the more you see your life as negative. While in reality most of the times it isn't. This is not to say that someone knowingly decides to be depressed but it's a definite truth that depression and self pity go hand in hand.

" Thinking about something else (not really possible with serious depression anyway) will not make it go away, even if you wanted it to."

What prevents a depressed person to think about something else? When someone suffers from depression is not in a kind of coma, nor has a flat electroencephalogram, that is to say that someone feeling depressed is still able to think and changing what he thinks he can change his feelings. Obviously helping someone to cross the road won't cure your cancer, and maybe you'll feel good and for a while you won't be thinking about your illness, and this in my opinion is already an improvement. You can be ill, but continuously thinking about it won't make you any good, and this is certain.

As regards the Victorian lack of understanding once I read that depression was an upper class condition because the "lower" class was too occupied to survive to have the time to feel depressed. Now, this is clearly an exaggeration but instead of lying on a bed thinking how much unlucky you are doing something manually or physically can really help to feel better. And if you don't have a flat electroencephalogram this is something you can do. That's why even doctors advise patients suffering from depression to begin gardening or similar activities.

Also sometimes feeling depressed is a great way to have the attention of everyone around.

"Our lord taught compassion above all else."

This is true, but if I have to choose between being compassionate for someone suffering and remain still looking at him going down the hill every day more or doing something to help him regain control over his life, well, I choose the second one. Clearly there are some persons suffering from very serious depression, but the great majority could be helped by just shifting their attention from the inside to the outside world. If you don't look out of the window how can you see the flowers around your room?

Now Tricia ,let me ask you one simple question: if the educated understanding of depression and the consequent common way of treatment (hours and hours of therapy plus a good amount of chemical drugs) are the right way to go why so many people are suffering from depression so that antidepressants sell more every year? If the actual treatment of depression is so good why depression is still such a big issue?

Thanks again for your contribution. :)

Marie

I see that your post is talking about Holiday depression, which many do experience because of changes in life, be it to loss, health finances, etc. My sister experiences a sorrowful depression during the Holidays, as she lost her 18 year old son five years ago, so your tips would absolutely help her! She is overseas, reconnecting with family during this Christmas and she has emailed me with happy emails.

For those who are suffering from prolonged depression, making the effort, even if it hurts, to take positive actions, such as helping others, or doing something kind for oneself, WILL help retrain their brain's pathways. Thoughts do have a chemical influence on our brains and body. I highly recommend Dr. Daniel Amen's books, and any literature from the HearthMath Institute. They support a holistic approach to mental well being, and have clinical data to support their approaches; in other words they pretty much share your holistic approach.

Cheers, and Merry Christmas!

Tricia

Well Dale, I certainly agree with you! The comments in this article are dangerous and belong back in the dark ages. Having experience of Cognitive Therapy myself, I would say treating serious depression at this time of year (or any other) is much more than positive thinking, even in CT. Feeling a bit fed up and feeling you'd like to give something back to society - by all means help out in some helpful way over Christmas. Suffering from serious depression - then it totally unlikely that you'll be able to look after yourself, let alone be much use to anyone else. Have you ever suffered from serious depression, or known anyone close to you with it? Obviously not, or you would not sprout such uneducated, naive rubbish. What is digging in the dirt, supposed to mean? The implications are very unsavoury in the least, as if the person is knowingly wallowing in self pity - far from a real, educated understanding of depression. Thinking about depresson makes you more depressed too huh? Good grief another uneducated and inappropriate comment which belongs to the Victorian age view of undeserving illnesses. Lets not think about cancer or heart disease either, go out and help an old lady across the road instead and your illness just might go away - sorry, get real please. Thinking about something else (not really possible with serious depression anyway) will not make it go away, even if you wanted it to. As it happens I do have deep spiritual committment, and I don't doubt the writers committment either, but please our lord taught compassion above all else. This is not compassion, this is misplaced Victorian lack of understanding and ill educated guesswork of the worst kind, even if done unknowingly.

hypnodude

Well, Dale, this is only your opinion and as everyone else you're entitled to have yours, as well as I can have mine. As regards dealing with depression there are two schools of thought: one uses mainly digging in the dirt with the help of chemical drugs to deal with depression and it's such a good approach that usually it takes years before problems are solved. The other approach instead focuses on the positive and instead of searching for the hidden reasons behind depression, which focuses your mind on negative things, tries to lift your mood by doing something else and changing the focus of your mind to more positive things.
This is not to say depression isn't a serious illness, it is, but digging in the dirt and taking drugs is not the only way to go.
Maybe it doesn't work this way for you, but for a lot of people thinking about their depression just make them more depressed, doing something else, and especially for someone else instead can really make someone feel better. And if you are able to feel better for a while then for that time you're not depressed. Which in my humble opinion is a positive thing.
Last, I don't know where do you come from, but from where I come being a Christian is not a negative thing and the word moron still belongs to a period when so called morons where thrown into mental institutes. That is to say I'm not offended by being called a Christian moron.
Thanks for your comment and have a great Christmas.

Dale

You aren't serious are you? - Here.. let's deal with your depression by ignoring it the reasons behind it. This is a totally bogus approach, a throwback to before depression was recognised as a legitimate illness/condition & merely works to further alienate those who suffer from it.
From your attitude I can only assume you are either a Christian or a moron - Possibly both